music and all that

I made this mix cd a while ago, in a bit of a female angsty place (my status quo, I know), but listening to it this morning, I remembered just how great it is, and have played it about five times today. Although now it might be time for something a little more cheery :)

 

I just met up with a young woman who's doing her MA dissertation on music and suffering... I thought from her emails that her wrk sounded similar to mine - but on the whole, it wasn't. Not sure whether to be pleased or slightly sad about that. As the PhD months roll on, I feel more and more isolated in my work. No one, not even my supervisor, actually knows this topic, in the same way I do (and I know if they did, there'd be no point in my PhD), which means I don't really get to talk to anyone about work in the way I'd like to. In some ways I miss working in an office where everyone had a common cause. I can't see myself going back to an NGO now, knowing what I know, but there's something very solitary about research that doesn't always make me happy. I'm at the point now  - which I did *not* understand when I first started - that when someone asks me what it is that I do, I'm genuinely at a loss for what to say. I used to say that if you couldn't describe your PhD in five words, you didn't have a clear enough idea of where you were going. And while I still believe that (my five are 'sexual violence narratives in music', or 'trauma narratives in pop music' - depending on the day), it's the follow up question, 'so what does that mean?' that has me more stumped for an answer without long, academic words in it than it used to. 

While we're in Memory Lane..

...and speaking of things looking smaller that they used to, here's my old school, Kirk Merrington Primary School. My gran used to be the lollipop lady!

Spennymoor

Spennymoor. It's one of those places where everything's changed and nothing's changed. I guess what's changed is me. It certainly looks *smaller* now than I remember it - every time I see it I think this. I guess it's been 13 years since I actually lived there, and not much less since I stopped going there for anything. 

Two of my friends from those days are coming to stay this weekend, and I'm really excited to see them. We met up at Christmas and had a great time. I think it's going to be weird catching up on so many missed years of each others' lives... but there's something really great about being able to spend time with people who knew me that long ago. I don't think I remember a time when I didn't know Joanne, and I think Jude and I must have been friends since we were about 9... will have to ask her if that's right. 

I'm excited to show them where - who - I am now, and to hear their stories. I feel I should be apprehensive about whether or not we'll all still like each other... but somewhere, I seem to know that we will.

Who needs oxygen anyway?

Well, yesterday was frustrating health-wise, but excellent sports-wise! Spent the whole day pretty much struggling for breath, and did some work from the comfort of bed. Seeing as I won't get my chest x ray back for about a week, I decided there's no point worrying about it, and I might as well try and get on with everything. So, that in mind, I played my second Hartswood ladder match, against Simon. Simon is above Dominic - who I drew 6-6 (1-1) with - in the ladder, so I was slightly worried about getting a spanking. Fears seemed to be confirmed when I went 0-3 down in the first set, and I was thinking how nice it would be to get off the court and go back to bed. But then the pace increased and I started to hit better and was able to run him around a little more. I was pleased with how I played, despite hitting way more out than normal - but I think this is because I am going for more winners. Anyway... I managed to win that set 6-4, and then took the next 6-3. Yay!

Monday blues

Ugh... well, I don't normally hate Mondays, but the breathing problems I've been trying to ignore every evening over the last couple of weeks have now visited during the day, forcing me to take them a little more seriously. Got an emergency appointment with the doctor who promptly sent me off to hospital for a chest x-ray... so I guess we now wait and see. Too busy to get sick, so definitely planning to carry on ignoring it unless told otherwise. On that note, I will be playing tennis this evening, or at least trying too. My last league match ended rather disappointingly when the floodlights went out at 6 games all, 1 point all. Let's hope tonight is more conclusive - whichever way.

Jill Sobule

This is such a great idea. I hope everyone who's ever heard of her or wants to support fantastic musicians to do their own thing gets involved, however little they can afford. I'm definitely going to... 

Have a listen to Bitter (a song she wrote after Jewel hit the stratosphere and Jill didn't - despite the hype being the other way around in those pre-Lilith Fair days) if you need convincing.

Burns night

If only I lived in Minnesota...

because I LOVE the idea of a drunk spelling bee, almost as much as the idea of a drunk bee...

Laura Marling

I'm obsessed with her song 'New Romantic' at the minute. In general, I think she sounds like a cross between Kate Nash and Ani DiFranco...

Enjoy

Tennis frenzy

Well, there's a lot to report since I last posted, and most of it is tennis-related. As I write, I'm watching the incredible Australian Open semi-final between Nadal and Tsonga. We saw Tsonga win the tiny Surbiton tournament last year, and marked him out then as one to watch. He's currently 2 sets to love up against Nadal, and has just broken him in the third, AMAZING.

On a slightly smaller scale, Alice and I played an LTA ratings singles tournament on Sunday. Despite being the oldest people there (I was twice as old as most people... so Alice was positively ancestral), we pulled out a pretty good showing, both losing one match and winning one. I was delighted with the match I won - I played really hard to beat a 15 year old (who I later saw crying!! I felt terrible!), and came through some tough points to win 6-1, 6-3. I got absolutely spanked by a rising star next, 6-0, 6-1, but I really enjoyed playing her, and despite the scoreline, probably played some of my best tennis against her. Anyway, Alice and I both really enjoyed the day and we'll definitely do some more.

The next day, I was playing doubles on a much smaller scale for the morning league. It was pretty frustrating at first (later I would describe this as watching monkeys discover fire), but by the time we were in our last match (in the pissing rain), I quite enjoyed it. Charlotte and I discovered how to play with each other, and our end scores were 7-6, 1-6, (10-4) in the first match, and a more decisive 6-3, 6-1 in the second.

Today is the first day I've woken up since and not ached, so it stands to reason that I have a match this evening for the Hartswood winter league. Back to the comfort zone of doubles with Alice this time, so it should be a fun match. And of course, we get fed afterwards which is a big plus (depending on what it is of course).

Tsonga serving for the match right now!!! and he WINS! 6-2, 6-3, 6-2. No one's beaten Nadal like that, not even Federer. Very much looking forward to the final now.

Back to non-tennis news:

The flats were finally finished yesterday, and we had a champagne reception for everyone who helped, and for the estate agents who will be selling them last night. Everyone seemed really impressed, so hopefully that will translate to quick sales :)

Tomorrow night is Burns night, and never having been to one before, I figured it was about time. So James, Dan, Rachel, Brandon and I are taking ourselves to the nice pub on Strand on the Green for haggis, neeps and tatties - whatever that all is, and maybe a drunken Burns recitation. Sounds like fun anyway.

Nothing to report on my PhD this week as it's pretty much all been taken up with my alternative careers of tennis playing and property developing. Ha. That's all got to change next week, as I've got some serious work to do before leaving for NZ at the end of Feb. My camera arrived so I'm learning how to use it before we leave too.

Oh, and lastly, my friend Jill has introduced me to a new singer called SoKo, who may be the cutest thing ever. Download her song I'll Kill Her here :) Thanks Jill!

busy busy busy

I've fallen behind a bit on updating, but am determined to keep going, even though documenting my PhD-ridden, boring-assed life is somewhat depressing. Not that I've even been able to do much PhDing recently. The flats go on the market this week, so I'm helping with dressing them. During the course of this I have discovered the following:

a) shopping is not as much fun when it's not for you

b) I am some kind of IKEA bedside table-assembling guru

c) it's all more time consuming than it looks on Property Ladder

Still, despite not having had a real weekend for some time, I escaped today to go and see 'Charlie Wilson's War' with Alice. It was pretty good (if you ignore the actual essence of what they were doing and just concentrate on things like funny dialogue and good acting). My hatred of Tom Hanks dwindles as the years pass - maybe I've mellowed, maybe he's become genuinely less annoying.

And Dan's cooking some kind of supper tonight, so yay for that!

virgin media finally does something right

Well, after a couple of weeks worth of customer service in which I was sorely tempted to offer each and every operative a banana, Virgin Media has finally supplied me with the product I asked for (next test: correct billing). Speedy internet - hurrah! Alice came over and fixed it up good and proper, and there are no problems so far. Indeed, the latest episode of Grey's Anatomy should be just a few moments away... not that I'll watch it before my lunch break of course (ahem)... ok maybe I'll have an early lunch.

On Wednesday night, a group of us went to see my friend Ben's band, The Jay Scott Project. They really were excellent and deserve to be snapped up very soon. Hopefully I'll see them again soon. They reminded me a bit of the first time I saw the Storys - tight memorable songs, and just an aura of 'this is the beginning of something bigger'. I've been wrong before (Jack Savoretti - why was your album so overproduced when you are SO DAMN GOOD live?!) but I have my fingers crossed that these guys get the success they deserve. Some of the other acts on were pretty good too. One half of an identical twin band 'Strawberry Blonde' - good songs, terrible name... think a Melissa (Ferrick or Etheridge, either would do) from Denmark. I also liked this band, although the singer could have done with a big shot of confidence to go with her voice. It's only fun if you enjoy it :)

Last night, Alice and I played squash, and she gave me some good pointers and a decent practice session. I'm still rubbish, but I have high hopes for becoming average at some point. Then a dip in the pool to cool off, followed by a Ground burger and the last episode of the Office before the writers' strike set in. Totally support what they are doing, but really wish that the companies would just give in to their demands already so all the things I watch can start being written again!

Planning to make something from the Rachel Allen cookbook tonight... possibly spicy Korean beef with lime and avocado rice...

organisation and food

Well, so far today I have managed to apply for my Australian visa, rewrite some of my chapter for that book, totally tidy my office, do my laundry and hang up all my clothes. And watch several episodes of season 3 Weeds and the first episode of season 5 L Word while doing so. I do like the L Word. I think it is deeply flawed in its attempts to be diverse, and I think the way it has dealt with bisexuality, butch identities and transgender issues is absolutely shocking. But there's still something about it. Maybe it's just the collection of very attractive women, or maybe it's just plain entertaining. Anyway, I will continue to watch and see...

I made a deliciously hot potato curry last night, and also a dessert using up various things from the kitchen including marscapone cheese, dark chilli chocolate, amaretto and bananas. mmm...

Tonight I was hoping to go to my favourite Indian restaurant in Balham, but it has been chucking it down most of the day, and as we were planning to go on the bike, this may not happen. Still, I'm in quite a happy cooking place at the minute. Got several recipe books in the sales, including Jamie Oliver and Rachel Allen, and there are several more things I'm looking forward to trying. Went for an old school Delia at the weekend, Basque Chicken (which conjures up very odd images for me every time I think of the name, but is delicious). It's a bit like a stew with rice, but the rice actually cooks in the stew - the liquid is mainly made up of white wine, which when mixed with the stock and the oil from the chorizo, makes it very sweet.

Monday muscles

ahh...how I ache. Played squash with James on Saturday morning, which was a lot of fun but very tiring. I still can't quite get my head around the fact that both players are on the same side of the 'net', or that it's not tennis in general. I have a drop shot that kind of works, but my serve bites, and I can't return serve from the left hand side well at all. Still, I do enjoy it, so hopefully practice will make me better. Went down to the Hartswood yesterday to play some tennis before lunch and got embroiled in quite a difficult set. My partner and I did come back from 1-3 down to win 6-4, but I definitely over-stretched to make a few good shots. A little walk last night just about finished me off, and today I don't intend to leave the house!

Got some feedback from my editor about that chapter, and it looks like things may not be as bad as they could be, so I'm hoping that the revisions will only take me a day or two. I want to do a good job on it, because I have the feeling it might follow me around... but it's got nothing to do with my actual PhD, and as such, the amount of time I spend on it should reflect that.

Not too much happening this week, luckily. Official PhD stuff doesn't start again until next Monday, so I have a week to get my head down and try and finish a few things off. On Thursday, the Virgin Media people are supposed to arrive and give me better internet, but given their incompetence of the last week (including them apparently telling BT we are changing our phone line - aargh), I'm not holding my breath.

Andrew is coming to stay on Wednesday night and I think we're going to see Ben's band, the Jay Scott Project, play a gig in Hammersmith. Should be fun.

Reasonable success

Hurrah - everything done. And I even managed to deal with the printer. Granted, my desk is only tidy because I have untidied other places, but it's nice to be able to se it again.

Chatted to Molly this afternoon, which was very nice, as we haven't talked in ages. I always forget to sign into AIM, because I usually use MSN and Skype, but most of my US friends are on AIM, so I should make more of an effort. Even got to talk to Nikki, aka my Secret Santa, which was an extra bonus (note zero use of the word 'posse' in that sentence).

Went over to Alice's as it looked like the Andy Murray tennis match was shaping up to be tough with a first set tiebreak. Got there at the end of it to see him win the second set in about 10 minutes 6-0... so not quite the match I was looking for. Still, we managed to sneak in an episode of The Office while I was there. It was the one involving Angela, Andy and ABBA. I think Angela is my favourite character.

I've added some other friends' blogs, although not the LiveJournal ones, as they are mainly 'friends only' anyway.

Time for wine and stew now :)

Photograph

Natural Forms

Mine's the one with the um... rocks and waterfall... and a very tiny sunbather (Alice)

more things to do

1. clear (even more) enormous pile of crap from desk, seeing as there is now hardly enough room for my laptop on it.

2. do laundry before running out of clothes: note, this may well happen tomorrow

3. reply to three emails

4. finish reading the 'social issues in television fiction' book

That's it for today. I'm starting small.

New Year's Resolutions

Haven't compiled a definitive list yet... and was almost defeated in my efforts to blog today by the lack of internet that blighted my entire working day. Add that to the five hours I spent on and around the phone to virgin media in an attempt to get them to upgrade my internet - yes, it is THAT hard to get them to let you spend more money with them than you already are - and you find a Deborah who is not in a friendly internet place.

Needless to say, none of yesterday's tasks have been accomplished today, thanks to virgin media... or Satan's Little Helpers, as I shall be calling them from now on. I did actually spend a lot of the time on hold drawing pictures of customer service operators being killed in various inventive ways. I guess phone queues bring out the creativity in me.

Happy New Year

Well, the tennis turned into a somewhat epic match, with Alice and I taking the first set from Andrew and Alex 6-3, but then losing the second and third 4-6, 0-6, almost taking it to a fifth set but in the end losing the fourth 5-7. I don't think anyone expected it to be as good as it was but there was some excellent tennis with everyone playing really hard. And it's good for Alice and I to get beaten sometimes as it gives us something to work on. I hope they'll play us again soon.

By the time we were done, the rest of my to-do list seemed like a distant memory, and all I could really think about was getting in a very hot bath with lots of the 'aching muscle super soak' that my mother prophetically provided for Christmas before my body totally seized up. Champagne, carbonara and Buffy followed, until about 10.30, when I insisted on a walk so that I didn't fall asleep before midnight. Managed to just see in the New Year, then fell asleep at about 12.03 :)